I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream 'Cause We've Got F***-All Better Uses for Our Time

     FYI

     Lest anyone ask me again...
     
     Yes. "Fookin'" is considerably more obscene/offensive than "feckin'." 

     Attention, Wilkinson:

     So what's it gonna be, dude? Are we gonna call the band "The Rolling Commandos" or "Süperflüöüs Ümläüts?" And are we stilll gonna record the long-deferred Death Metal cover of Tommy Roe's "Sweet Pea"? 

     Anyway.... Since I didn't get to bring my own toys when last we lowered your neighbors' property values, here's my "classic" ("classic" being a euphemism for "Grow up and a get a fuckin'' life, you superannuated Hawkwind wannabe!") effects setup. All stomp-boxes, you'll note. (Rack-mounted effects are the signal-processing equivalent of narcissists -- entirely too fucking delicate to survive more than a few hours in my company.) 
     I'll defer to your judgment when it comes to purchasing another wah, incidentally. Just remember how quickly I destroyed the (appropriately named) Crybaby before you advise. 




     I've saved the worst for (nearly) last: Loath though I am to be the bearer of ill tidings, I've had no luck when it comes to recruiting members for the Stacia Tribute Chorus Line. 
     Imagine my perplexity, by the way.
     "Let me get this straight... You'll show your tits for a string of cheap, plastic beads, but not for the sake of art? And you call yourself an 'intellectual!' Pffft! Vade retro, philistine! Back to the trough with the other convention-bound, materialistic Kapitalistenschweine and their pusillanimous, dissembing notions of hypocritical, nouveau riche, keeping-up-with-the-Joneses morality! What was that? Fuck me? Fuck you, bitch!" 
     On the positive side, however, I have learned to sprint whilst shielding my genitalia with both hands. That's gotta be one for the Guinness Book of World Records. Which leaves me wondering who's managed to set the world record for Guinness-consumption.